"and my heart turns violently inside of my chest...when I think about"

I love this song... but my thoughts today are not so much for that song.. just how those are the only words that express how badly i want to go out in this world... and "subdue" it?
I cannot explain, I cannot express how badly my heart turns and flips inside of my chest when i think about the great out doors, the unknown of this world.. just traveling, i see shows about it and i get to anxious i feel that I could explode, that i am just going to fall over of exhaustion from being so worked up and excited about the thoughts and dreams... my desires.
my heart and eye's are even drawn to guys with the same passions... the three guy's I've perused or "dated" have had the same heart, something inside of them spins when they are faced with or think about hiking, camping, backpacking... the great outdoors.

I cannot even explain... how sick I feel right now, for this longing to leave is wearing me down....it's exciting me... it's almost so much so that it's burdening.. it's time to go.... in may I have the first small adventure... cross country road trip in the US.

I will not sit idly by

I will not sit idly by and watch injustices happen with out trying to do something...
I wonder some times, what would I do in that situation, would I just sit back and wish for the best.. or take some kind of action... I've been taking action. and I am happy to be that person. its been little things, all having to do with ghetto brats. it started with taggers I came across while walking my dog one night... do I let them go, turns around and walk the other way or do I act? they stopped tagging and started walking away as soon as i showed up... so I decided to fallow them from a distance.. they made a quick turn and hopped a few fences and were gone. I haven't seen them again.
another time as i was leaving my house some young kid (maybe 16yrs old) starts tagging up (with a sharpie) the street sign right by my home. they had that week just replaced those signs because of all the tagging that had been there.. would I just drive by and not do anything? NO! I started honking my horn and waving my arms and pointing at him, he freaked out and took off running through the desert as fast a he could.

So to get to this week, monday was valentines day and I was at the mall piking up my brother and his girlfriends after their date.. when I pull in i see two kids in a crowded area fighting, he's dragging her off and she's swinging her arms trying to beat him up. I circle back around to see her swinging fists and what looks like him slamming her head into the railing... with a group of their friends just standing around. umm.. HELLO!! so i pull up to the curb and start honking my horn .. yes like a crazy lady.... and the friends throw up their hands at me in a "what? this is nothing go away" kind of fashion. so I parked my car in the fire lane and took off running for a security guard.. in that area they're always around... one pulled up and when i told him what was going on he said "oh I thought I saw something", but he quickly took care of it, an I was very grateful for that. My plan that night had been to walk my dog around the mall a few times for exercise... after that i decided just to stay close to the mall entrance with my big mean(looking) doggy :)
I saw the girl from the fight a few times more that night, she was bragging and boasting about being from L.A. and being in a gang. I wonder if she knew how ugly she looked to me....

so I do this, I try not to stand for injustices.. little things maybe, but I am proud of who I am.
I will probably wake up one day to find that I am a crazy old cat lady who yells at all the kids... I hope thats not the case, but I guess not caring about anyone or anything could be worst.

I don't want to be Idle... I want to be action!

Nothing Makes me Happier then Hiking

..Or so it seems.

I have an urge to take a nap.. and thats just not normal for me... but yesterday was so well worth the tired sore stiff muscles of today. God is so good to me. the day was long and felt like a week, but I enjoyed every piece of it.
Went to a meeting at the church at 9 am. one of first things to bring a smile to my face that morning was seeing hot air balloons floating and landing all about.

After the meeting I had time to kill and had brought my dog with me. so we walked through the desert for about an hour and a half. we walked past this little old lady who was also out for a stroll... or on her way home. and as we passes I worked up the courage to get out of my comfort zone and say hi as she passes.. as nervous as I was to give out that small little act, Once I did she seemed ten times more nerves about accepting it then I giving it out. she was fidgety and stood as far on other side of the path as she could..she said nothing. how far we've come.. we are lonely but yet a small act like saying hello to a stranger face to face is hard, yet we will e mail or facebook a complete stranger just because. I'll stive to be better at this.. falling along the way, but I'll pick my self up and try try again.

After my meeting and our long walk I went in to enjoy the church service, I spent the last few moments of it out front with my dog eating fruit loops in the sun listening to the music and singing beyond the doors... it was sweet. met up with friend out front then decided to go to lunch with them. the weather was beautiful and we sat outside...

Then we went hiking! it was a crazy road to get there, twist, turns, fearing for my life! but it was great, three in the back seat plus my dog, who decided he had to sit on the seats to with us and not the floor. we started our hike with the sun out and the weather warm, and by the time we decided to turn back the sun was set, the sky was bright pink and we were cold. the moon lit our way and the constant of moving kept us warm. it was a good night for a hike, great friends to spend time with, and a crazy cool place to be.

Hiking, Biking and Walks.... yea those bring me joy :)

Weddings....

This week has been filled with arts and crafts.
I'm making invites for my sisters wedding shower, I'm loving it, it's relaxing and fun, now that I have a finished product I am happy with. A few of us girls were also able to go help her with some of her center pieces and they helped me with the invites to, everything came out beautifully and spending time with these wonderful girls was amazing. very blessed indeed. her wedding is going to be so elegant and beautiful.

I can't wait to dance the night away... and see her walk down the aisle!!!

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun...

Last night I had dinner with some amazing girls.
We had spaghetti with brown rice noodles, spicy sausage and mushrooms. garlic bread, parmesan, chef salad and cherry pie for dessert. The food was so good, the conversation was wonderful and the friendship is great. I learned about buying and selling gold, and how to sell on ebay. we talked about life and friends and adventure...
no gossip or rumors or putting anyone down
just positive loving uplifting words.

May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart
be pleasing in your sight,
O LORD,
my Rock and my Redeemer.
psalm 19:14

like the pins say...
I Am Loved..