love sick fish.

Have you made me out to be a monster in your mind? It seems the only way of letting go. you play all the actions and moments out a million times over again, till all you see is how wrong I was. But You, You are far to Beautiful. I've tried. And everytime I do I feel like a fool. I miss you more. I'm like a fish caught on a hook bleeding from the jaw, I can't excape, I can't get anywhere else. I'm trapped, by my own mind. Your not reeling me in, no. But I'm just there, swimming.. soon to be floating. Maybe I'll brake the line and escape. But this line in my jaw will still be there.. this badge, this scar,I don't want to give it away.

My whole life I didn't want kids of my own.. I love kids, I just didn't want any... and then with in a few months I thought maybe... and now this week I've realized I want kids... all you guys today was just a reminder... oh crazy life.

Going to Mexico.. to find my Heart is here.

worn down, beat up and just not in a vary good mood is how I left Mexico.
it's beautiful the people, the food, the culture there, I really love all of it.
But as soon as we landed in California, my heart was glad again.. These are my people, This is my Heart. God has placed me here for a reason, for a purpose. These are my people, This is my Heart, and I know how to love them here. The great Almighty shows me his love here, He teaches me, He holds me and He grows me here.